That is a statement I would never want to repeat in my life. It's almost tragic just thinking about it. Life passing by in an almost casual way, but there's nothing casual about it when it happens. Not something to take lightly, with people moving on, going on with life the way they should. While I just sit and watch as life pass by me, thinking of all the things I could have done. Indifference has overcome me for these years, and it's a sick haze constantly covering me. I feel safe with indifference a familiarity I find from nothing else. With indifference, I need not worry. Till life past by me. all the drawings I've skipped out on. It's easy to critique but actually doing something takes effort, effort I've lost of these years. Where's the motivation? Having all the inspiration around but no motivation to encourage it a wasted gift. I'm truly destructive, there is no excuse, I haven't learned over the years, perfected the things I should have mastered. I'm scared, and I still don't care. I have acknowledge this, but I still make no attempt at fixing this. Someday day I'll...perhaps young and well? What's next? Oh well. This is disgusting.
Posting this so I can have a completed fourth, and for my productive summer list which I'll re post eventually.
This was the original post I never got to posting in May, and I almost feel guilty. But not really. Ok.
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